orkshops on diversity and inclusion. Interactive sessions on what the letters LGBTQIA+ mean, the importance of each one, and the impact that disrespecting them can have on each person who identifies with the acronym. A Slack group, #coverpride, where people from the community and allies participate, dedicated to sharing and debating information on the topic. Coverflex's People team has been joining forces - not just for Pride month, but throughout the year - to build a sustainable diversity and inclusion strategy that fosters information sharing, interaction, and learning. All of this helps us to build a space where a topic that in so many places is still treated as so unnatural can be addressed in a natural and open way: the identity of each one of us.
Today we share with you the stories of three Coverflexers who belong to the LGBTQIA+ community. Taís and Tadeu grew up in Brazil and Chris grew up in England, in the '90s. They have moved to Portugal over the past few years and found Coverflex, a place that lets them be their true selves, with no reservations. These are their stories.
Taís’ story
“I've always identified as a person belonging to the LGBTQIA+ community. I think I've always known - it's part of my essence, of who I am as a human being. I was born that way”, says Taís, Lead Product Manager at Coverflex. However, and in her own words, sometimes we only really realise it as time goes by. “When I stop to think about it, I think it was around the age of 18 that I realised I was attracted to women. It was still a time of a lot of taboo, it wasn't talked about in Brazil”.
It was at the workplace that Taís felt it was more difficult to be herself. She has been in different companies in Brazil where people had homophobic behaviours and derogatory comments, where they openly said that being gay is “not normal”. She has been in companies where doubts were raised about whether people belonging to the LGBTQIA+ community would be competent in their work - not because of their qualifications but because they identified with what the acronym stands for. But the exception proves the rule: two companies she worked for made her feel welcome, and it was in one of them that she met the person who would become her life partner. They came to Portugal together for work, and have stayed until today.
Taís has worked in three different companies in Portugal, and left because she didn't identify with the culture and values, especially when it came to inclusivity. She says that Coverflex was the first company in Portugal where she found a welcoming environment, where she felt accepted for the person she is - and that's why she stayed. “From the beginning, everything happened very naturally. People respect the topic of gender diversity and talk about it. They want to understand the other person, they want to learn so they don't say something that might be hurtful. All people, starting with the management and People teams, want to know if I'm okay and what the company can do for me, genuinely. The #coverpride is an amazing group we have on Slack, not only because of the LGBTQIA+ people but also because of the allies. I feel very grateful to be here at Coverflex, and it's one of the things I tell my friends. It's really nice to be in an environment where I feel respected for the person I am. My wife says she has never seen me so happy”.
One of the People team's initiatives to ensure that Coverflex is, and continues to be, an inclusive and informed work environment involves organising interactive sessions with Alexa Santos (she/they), a social worker who focuses on educating youth and adults on social justice issues. “Calling Alexa [for one of the workshops] was amazing, and it was amazing to see everyone from our c-level there”, says Taís. “The importance of the movement and what the movement means, knowing the pains that people go through, having the possibility of learning... No one was required to be there but people were”.
One of the People team's initiatives to ensure that Coverflex is, and continues to be, an inclusive and informed work environment involves organising interactive sessions with Alexa Santos (she/they), a social worker who focuses on educating youth and adults on social justice issues. “Calling Alexa [for one of the workshops] was amazing, and it was amazing to see everyone from our c-level there”, says Taís. “The importance of the movement and what the movement means, knowing the pains that people go through, having the possibility of learning... No one was required to be there but people were”.
Today, Taís feels accepted by the people close to her. Her sister, who is younger, was her biggest support from the beginning, and her friends have also always supported her. She only came out to her parents when she was about 27, “because my parents are from a much older generation, with a very strong idea of the 'traditional family', so I didn't know how they would react. The perspective that people have on this subject depends a lot on when they were born, the environment they grew up in, how open their family is to talking and learning about it. But my parents received the news well. And today they support me. My father even told me something that I carry with me: if I worry about what people will think of me, I will never do anything with my life. If this is what I want and I'm not hurting anyone, then this is what I should do”.
Tadeu’s story
Tadeu, Operations Team Leader at Coverflex, realised he was gay when he was about 18. “Obviously, during childhood and my teen years people noticed me and talked about the topic, but I only understood myself when I was about 18 years old, and when I was 20 I assumed my identity”. Contrary to many people's experience, the place where he felt most safe to be himself was at home. “My parents are quite progressive people in that sense. My home was perhaps the place where it was easiest to talk openly about the topic”.
Tadeu classifies “coming out” moments in a certain order: first, at home and with friends. Then, the big “coming out” - the whole family. And then, forever. "We have thousands of ‘coming out’ moments because we live in a heteronormative society - for example, people always assume I have a girlfriend. And there are places where it's harder to come out than others”.
Work, for example, is usually “a place where people find it more difficult to be who they are, because they are always being judged, because it's a place where they don't know where people stand when it comes to this kind of topics, and they don't want to put something like their sexual orientation first, even though it's really important that they do”. He worked for over four years in a company in Brazil that had 100,000+ employees, and it wasn't until his last months there that Tadeu came out to his colleagues about his sexual orientation. “A friend of mine from work was also gay, so we managed to come out together. We leaned on each other. Before that, for years I was so afraid of opening up that when someone addressed me as if I were straight, for example suggesting that I had a girlfriend, I would change the topic”. Before coming out at that company, Tadeu heard many homophobic comments and statements. “I heard things that no one should ever hear. For a long time I bit my tongue and just accepted it”.
He moved to Portugal during university, and felt it was easier to show his true colours because he was in a context where people had similar values to his. After university, he joined Coverflex. “When I joined I felt that it was better to be careful here, just as I had felt in the previous company. But it was a self-protection mechanism because, unlike in my previous experience, I never felt there was something I couldn't say at Coverflex. Eventually I felt the time had come and I added my husband to Coverflex's health insurance. The only reaction I got from the company was a request for confirmation about whether we were married or dating, because it makes a difference to the insurance policy. It was all very natural”.
He moved to Portugal during university, and felt it was easier to show his true colours because he was in a context where people had similar values to his. After university, he joined Coverflex. “When I joined I felt that it was better to be careful here, just as I had felt in the previous company. But it was a self-protection mechanism because, unlike in my previous experience, I never felt there was something I couldn't say at Coverflex. Eventually I felt the time had come and I added my husband to Coverflex's health insurance. The only reaction I got from the company was a request for confirmation about whether we were married or dating, because it makes a difference to the insurance policy. It was all very natural”.
Tadeu adds the note that all people are in a learning phase, and keeping informed is fundamental. “Even though I belong in the community, every day I learn a lot about transgender people, lesbian people, and so on. There are all the letters, but even within each letter there is a lot to learn. I am gay and my experience as a gay man is different from the experience of a black gay man, for example. I learn every day about racism, about feminism, among many other very important topics”.
Chris’ story
He realised he was different as long as he can remember. He realised that he didn't ‘fit in’ throughout his childhood. And as he grew older, especially around the age of 10, he started to feel attracted to people of the same gender. “It was very scary for me because I felt it was something that wasn’t acceptable or something that wasn’t allowed”, explains Chris, Onboarding Specialist at Coverflex. “I suffered homophobia from a very young age, even before I knew what the word ‘gay’ meant people were calling me gay. They would say I was gay and that that was the worst thing in the world. Kids are a bit like that. They say these things, not because they’re necessarily homophobic but they’re scared they won’t fit in”.
When he came out to his friends at around 14 years of age, no one was hostile. However, in his opinion, this was because he was only telling people he trusted. “When I told my parents, they were not especially supportive. They thought they could change me, or they hoped that at least I was bisexual so I could ‘choose’ not to be gay. And then it really got better over time. Now my mum is super supportive”.
After moving to Portugal, Chris started working at Coverflex. “I can pay for therapy sessions through the benefits and discounts that Coverflex offers, and I think that's very good for employees. It's something that is clearly better and different from what happens in other companies. In other aspects, however, Chris would change some things. "We need to be asking questions about diversity in the hiring process and making clear what we say and feel about diversity in our hiring process. Because people probably are not going to show racist or homophobic behaviour or views on job interviews, but it’s good to make it clear these are the things we’re not flexible about. Culture is not set with words only, but actions. That's really what it comes down to. Words help, but actions validate them”.
After moving to Portugal, Chris started working at Coverflex. “I can pay for therapy sessions through the benefits and discounts that Coverflex offers, and I think that's very good for employees. It's something that is clearly better and different from what happens in other companies. In other aspects, however, Chris would change some things. "We need to be asking questions about diversity in the hiring process and making clear what we say and feel about diversity in our hiring process. Because people probably are not going to show racist or homophobic behaviour or views on job interviews, but it’s good to make it clear these are the things we’re not flexible about. Culture is not set with words only, but actions. That's really what it comes down to. Words help, but actions validate them”.
About his experience as a gay person, Chris explains that, like Tadeu, he feels that the reality of coming out is that it happens everyday, forever. “The reality is that I come out every day, whether by holding hands with my partner in the street or having to tell someone that I'm gay if they assume I have a girlfriend. Society is just very heteronormative. In a way, it's not homophobic at all to be that way, but it's good when people realise when they've made a mistake or said something that could hurt someone belonging to the LGBTQIA+ community, and use that as a way of learning”.
Still, Chris is never quite sure he can be his true self in front of people. "I still feel that it's not accepted or allowed that I'm gay. Internalised homophobia is a real problem. When you are a child, you take on homophobia and it stays with you. We do pride because the opposite of pride is shame and a lot of people have shame of who they are. In the gay community we see this internalised homophobia where we’re desperate to appease straight people rather than being who we are. Most of us have it to some extent. I will avoid holding my partner’s hand in public if I’m not feeling safe. It’s an internalised fear that being gay is wrong and not accepted in our society, and therefore you have to hide”.
The battle for LGBTQIA+ rights is not won, Chris warns. “If we let our guard down, we're going to see the consequences of that at a political level - we’re already seeing it in governments and extreme right-wing parties. This is not a debate - these are people’s lives. I’m knowledgeable and fairly persuasive but I wish I was more confident and outspoken so I could be more of an activist. Engaging with the political process is key. We have to engage politically and we have to tell representatives that we’re not going to stand for bigoted policies or policies that make lives of young LGBTQIA+ people more difficult”.
54 years after the Stonewall riots, people belonging to the LGBTQIA+ community continue to face discrimination. Coverflex is grateful for the openness and honesty with which Taís, Tadeu and Chris spoke about these topics, helping us to make clear that equal rights require continued attention and action - not just in June but on every day of the year, from all of us, all over the world.
